Downton Abbey Season 4 Review

Dave and I watched the Downton Abbey season four finale last night, and I’m now curious to know what some of you thought about it. Here’s what I thought:

Overall, I was a bit underwhelmed this season (particularly as it progressed toward the final episodes). Thinking about it, I realized that the main reason for this lukewarm sentiment was the lack of a compelling romance. Edith’s romances are always, well, icky, and the Tom/school teacher budding romance was uncomfortable at best. With Mary now free, there could have been at least the beginnings of something good, but no; I don’t mind the “multiple suitors vie for Mary’s attention” plot-line, but when they are all as boring as a pressed white shirt, who really cares? (The last guy actually started out with potential, but he pretty much became instantly boring once he fell in love with Mary and started being nice to her. (At any rate, he’s nowhere near as cute or charming as a certain blonde-haired lawyer from yesteryear). And poor Mary? She started out convincingly heartbroken, but is now back to being as unlikable (almost) as ever. If the writers don’t come up with a better male lead to humanize her a little, I fear we are in for a lot more of this self-absorbed heiress, “go ahead and try to win my affections” act.

What else happened? Well, I rather enjoyed Rose’s involvement with the black Jazz singer; he was delightfully cast. Daisy’s crush on Alfred (really, Alfred? –when cuter what’s-his-name guy was never good enough for you?) started out amusing enough, but if I am honest it was starting to wear pretty thin by the end of the season. And now Ms. Crawley has a suitor? Are we supposed to care about him or just enjoy watching her squirm whenever he brings her flowers and the like? The Anna/Bates conflict was by far the most interesting story-line this season, but I don’t think they did enough with it. Anna didn’t suspect Bates a little more given the arrows of pure hatred that he was shooting across the table at Mr. Green? Does she, like, know her husband? Did Bates confront the villain or simply push him into oncoming traffic with all the grace and precision of a trained assassin? After all, we now know he is a competent forger, a skilled pickpocket, and a very smooth liar. The season finale certainly could have done more with that, right? Speaking of the season finale, while killing off a main character every time seems far from necessary, I would like to be at least half-way to the edge of my seat waiting to see what will happen in the next season by the time the current season comes to an end. (To be fair though, the season finale did include an impressive number of gorgeous costume changes amid an apparently nonstop string of high-society events.)

As far as season five goes, all we seem to know for certain is that the Edith baby thing will explode (can’t say I’m looking forward to that), and that Mary will be pressured to pick a suitor (blah). They could have thrown some new complication into Mary’s love life (and, no, boring suitor #2 turning out to be super rich does not qualify). Or why not do more with Thomas’ scheming? We get vague threats that he has dirt on the new lady’s maid all season, but we still have absolutely no idea what those secrets might be? Even some revelation into what happened with Edith’s guy would have been appreciated. Is he living a double life? How ‘bout a shot of his body lying in a ditch? Come on, give us something to bite our teeth into! While the creators of the series are still nailing the details like setting, dialogue and humor, I’m afraid that if they don’t put a little more effort into major plot developments –or at least give us a decent love interest to pine after- the glory days of Downton may be forever lost somewhere down that dirt road near the smoking remains of Mathew’s car. 

Current Thoughts on The Affordable Care Act

I hope you don’t mind hearing my two-cents about The Affordable Care Act. But there is just so much fear-mongering going on about it (e. g. “this will be the worst disaster our country has ever seen, mark my words!”) and also a whole lot of talk of lost liberties (e.g. “you will not be able to keep your exact same plan and coverage, waaa!” –btw, yes, you  may have fewer plan options and your premiums may go up, but you will likely be getting more benefits in return such as lower deductibles, prescription drug coverage, etc.). Of course there's also a lot of Obama-slamming and political garbage going on too (e.g. "Obama deceived the American people, blah, blah, blah"). All that aside though, here's the way I see it; this new Act has a lot of potential to increase liberties, give Americans more options, and empower a lot of people. As just one example, let’s say I wanted to quit my job (also assuming that I was currently working outside of the home) and start a private speech therapy practice. Before, fear of not being able to pay for insurance while getting things up and running might have been a big deterrent. With the new system though, a “safety net” is put in place so that health care is not such a worry while my income is temporarily so low (because I will be getting a government subsidy). Once I build up a clientele and am back on my feet again, I can start paying back into the system. If I am paying more at that point, I don’t think I would mind so much. Also, doing something progressive about our currently 30 million uninsured Americans is a pretty big deal in my book. And you realize that we have been paying for those uninsured Americans all along –every time one steps into an E.R. and can’t pay the bill- right? Remember that we are starting from one of the worst healthcare cost situations in the rich world (we pay about twice per capita of what other countries pay, while still managing to have many Americans declare bankruptcy every year over medical expenses or simply get by without adequate care). It's nuts. We need to move to a better system, even if it isn't a perfect one.

Letter to Utah Senator Mike Lee

October 15, 2013

Dear Senator Lee,

I am writing as an American, Utahan, family member, and parent to express my concern with the current government shutdown and, more specifically, to express my disapproval of your behavior as an elected representative of Utah at the recent “Million Vet March” rally that took place earlier this week at the World War 2 memorial. I should begin by saying that the shutdown has hit close to home for me as I have a brother who has been furloughed these past weeks as well as a sister who may no longer be able to sell her house (as her buyer is seeking an FHA loan) due to the government shutdown. While I do not claim to understand all of the intricacies of the current political melodrama in Washington, D.C., when drastic action is taken that so negatively affects the lives of so many Americans, I have to wonder whether or not such action was justified and, in this instance, I simply cannot see how it was warranted. President Obama rightfully won the 2012 election; the majority of Americans supported the main changes that would be brought about by the Affordable Care Act (ACA). I am especially distressed by the failure of his opposition to use specific terms in describing what they perceive as the main problems with the ACA and, likewise, their failure to offer logical and specific alternative solutions. In fact, the opposition seems reluctant to even acknowledge that our current health care system (a system that includes some 30 million uninsured Americans, causes our government to have the highest health spending in the world, and causes many Americans to declare bankruptcy every year over medical expenses) is clearly dysfunctional. I am troubled when I consider the possibility that such violent and nonproductive opposition to the ACA may be personally and politically advantageous to certain political leaders regardless of whether they are truly representing the best interests of the majority of their voting constituency.

Just as the government shutdown has negatively affected many Americans on a personal level, it is to be expected that negative effects would also follow on a national level, including the closure of many of our National Parks and monuments. I do not understand how anyone, let alone one of my own elected representatives from Utah, could expect these monuments to stay open and operational when they simply lack the personnel and financial resources to do so given the current government shutdown. Listening to the speeches given at Sunday’s rally, including your own, there was no logical or truthful connection between the closure of the monument being a direct result of the shutdown and, in turn, of the shutdown being a direct result of the activities of all our government officials, including the actions and decisions of our elected officials from the Republican Party. The rally exemplified what I believe most frustrates the majority of Americans concerning the current state of our government: the extreme polarization of the political parties; a complete unwillingness to compromise for the common good; a readiness to make excuses, to place blame elsewhere, and to villainize the opposition; and, most importantly, a lack of honest accountability to the very people they promised to serve and represent.

I could say more about the distasteful nature of some of comments that were made at the rally –comments which you appear to have supported and applauded – specifically Larry Klayman’s racially and religiously bigoted comment that Obama should “put the Quran down” and “come out with his hands up.” I was also confused by your apparent approval of the prominent presence of a Confederate flag at the rally, a symbol that is associated with white supremacy much in the same way that the Nazi swastika is associated with anti-Semitism. However, I hope that I have already made my disapproval and disappointment quite clear. I believe that the majority of Utahans want to be represented by reasonable conservative politicians who demonstrate thoughtful and responsible behavior. I sincerely hope that you will better consider the true preferences and attitudes of the majority of the Utahans you represent as well as the reputation of our great state as you go forward serving our community and country in the future.

Laurie Madsen

Logan, Utah 

New Addiction: Choffe

So Choffe is kind of what it sounds like: a chocolaty-spin on coffee, specifically with ground cocoa beans instead of ground coffee beans. I’ve heard it called “Mormon coffee,” and people like me (Mormons who know in their hearts they would be coffee drinkers if it wasn’t for the WoW) are an obvious target. It brews just like coffee, and I’ve heard it works best in a French Press (since I don’t have one of those, I just let it soak it hot water in the microwave and pour it through a fine mesh strainer into my thermos). It claims to be supremely healthy but I’m a little skeptical of that claim –especially after I add good dose of sweetened coffee creamer, but I guess that it probably would beat out cookies or ice cream for a “healthy” late-night snack. It is wonderfully rich, earthy tasting stuff. The aroma alone is magnificent. And there’s not really any going back to regular hot chocolate after trying this. So you’ve been warned. If you want to risk becoming an addict too they sell it on Amazon and also at “Luv to Cook” in Logan.

Adventures in Snacking: Naturebox Review

Naturebox is a monthly subscription service that sends you an adorable little box full of five small snack bags for 20 dollars a month. My favorite part of the experience since signing up (which happened a few months ago after seeing an ad on Facebook) has been the excitement of opening the box and trying each of the five new snacks for the first ime. And they have been, overall, very tasty little snacks. My neighbor called them “froo froo” snacks and was a little hesitant to eat many since they are kind of fancy and expensive. Their big thing is that they are “healthier” (no high fructose corn syrup, no artificial colors, blah blah) which is great, but my biggest selling point has been the variety of flavors it’s been bringing to my pantry on a monthly basis. Except cross out “monthly” and replace it with “weekly” since that’s about how long they last (yes, with a family of only two adults and a toddler). They are just a little too yummy and the quantities a little too small to stretch very far into the month. (It’s also true that the idea of “healthy snacks” could arguably pose an oxymoron). I think we will cancel our subscription soon, but it has been fun while it lasted. Here’s a sample of what we’ve received.

July Box:

Bag 1: Big Island Pineapple Rings – delectable dried pineapple (really, better than Trader Joe’s) but also very small in quantity and gone by the third day

Bag 2: Sun Dried Tomato Almonds – good roasted almond flavor (reminded me of almonds I have bought in little tins in the past) with the crusted-on tomato spice giving a nice twist

Bag 3: Country Ranch Sunflower Seeds – a bit of a disappointment, perhaps because the second bag of straight nuts in one month. Also, the ranch flavor is pretty subtle. Tastes a lot like any bag of sunflower seeds I have tried in the past.

Bag 4: Blueberry Figgy Bars –These really are yummy and come with around six individually wrapped smallish bars. I have tried other fancy fig/granola bars and these are the best; Really hearty to bite into without any fake-y aftertaste. Peter loves them.

Bag 5: Lemon Tea Biscuits –adorable little  shortbread-type cookies that would go perfectly with a hot cup of Choffee. Also soft and bite-sized and easy for Peter to eat.

Other Things We’ve Gotten:

Granolas –mixed feelings here. I’ve definitely preferred the soft-cluster granola over the super-crunchy variety. The flavors have been very good (banana bread granola, cherry chocolate granola, etc.) but the bigger issue is what do you do with such a small portion of granola? Eat one bowl of it for breakfast? Spread it out by sprinkling on yogurt of couple of times? It’s just kind of an awkward snack for eating on it’s own.

Savory Cracker-type Things –Italian Bistro Pretzles, Sesame Stix, Toasted Cheddar Stix, Guacamole Stix, and other similar fare has been satisfying overall and can work well in place of croutons, crackers, or chips.

Trail Mixes –This has perhaps been my favorite type of item; I love the combinations and flavors naturebox comes up with! Both the Taj Mahal Snack Mix (wonderful with golden raisins and a curry flavor) and the Italian Trail Mix (dried tomatoes, robust herb-flavor) were delish.

Kettle Corns (AKA: Corn Nuts) –Mesquite, BBQ, or Honey Roasted, it still tastes a lot like Corn Nuts to me. A big complaint is that they are way too hard-crunchy to feed to Peter. But Dave and I must not be very hot on them either since we still have a couple of unfinished bags sitting in our cupboard.

So that should give a pretty good idea of what naturebox is all about. I guess they also try to “give back” by donating to organizations that help fight hunger, which sounds very cool, but I haven’t researched the company enough to know very much about that. For lots more info you can go to naturebox.com.

Book Review: The Glass Castle

*While this post is mostly a review of The Glass Castle (a
memoir of Jeannette Walls’s childhood), it also incorporates ideas inspired by
Half Broke Horses (a true-life novel by Jeannette Walls’ about the life of her
maternal grandmother and the childhood of her mother). The two books are a lot
like “prequel” and “sequel” of the same work to me.

The Glass Castle probably made it to the best seller list
for a lot of reasons, but one of those reasons certainly has to be because of
the gripping narrative that it tells. From the first scene in which a
3-year-old Jeannette catches on fire while boiling hot dogs (her mother
explains that children need to learn self-reliance from an early age) and is
then “rescued” early from the hospital by her father -who is always running
from one problem or debt collector to the next- you know that she is in for one
heck of a childhood. Near the end of the novel, when a teenage Jeannette and
her siblings struggle to put every penny they can into an “escape” fund only to
have it raided by their alcoholic father, I was invested in the Walls’ story
and struggle.

I think what really intrigued me though -what I haven’t been
able to stop thinking about since- were the larger-than-life characters –precisely
because they were not, in fact “larger-than-life” but because they were as
“real life” as it comes. Watching an interview with the author, she said that
one of the things that struck her most while researching the life of Lily
Casey, as extraordinary as her exploits may seem to us now, was how “common”
Lily’s story was for that day and age. She also discussed how, while the
actions of others may be hard to understand at surface level, the answers to
why people do the things that they do can often be found by taking a look into
their past. Rose Mary Walls’, Jeannette’s mother, a well-informed,
college-educated woman, raised by an extremely resourceful mother, but unable
to hold down a steady job. Rex Walls’, Jeannette’s father, with his sharp intelligence,
big dreams, and insatiable curiosity, but largely controlled by his destructive
addictions. Looking at Rose Mary’s upbringing explains a lot; her childhood,
spent exploring an enormous ranch, was characterized by freedom and adventure
–ideals she continued to seek as an adult. What’s more, Rose Mary’s generation,
which is also the generation of my own mother (and I’ve drawn several parallels
between the two women), lived to see the “wild places” of their childhoods be
tamed; literally, as The West was developed and modernized, but perhaps
figuratively as well. They seemed to live in this special window where children
were no longer seen as “little adults,” meant to start pulling their weight
from an early age, but before modern parenting advice forbade giving a good
spank or advised against letting your children roam free. This generation also
grew up under the threat of the atom bomb, and I wonder if that wouldn’t have
led to a certain sense of resignation or helplessness against the “powers that
be.” Contrasting Rose Mary’s approach to life with that of her mother’s, Lily
Casey’s, the differences are obvious. Granted, Lily Casey was never the “free
spirit” that Rose Mary was, but she also learned early on that survival was a
struggle, sentimentality a weakness she couldn’t afford. So, the point is that
it’s led me to think a lot about the importance of the context in which we grow
and live, particularly of the generation to which we belong.

At the same time, and maybe in direct contrast to this idea,
is the idea that life is what we choose to take away from it –despite the
context of our upbringing. The case in point here being Jeannette Walls who
became a best-selling author and apparently lives an emotionally healthy life
(now living with and taking care of her mother). In that same author interview,
Walls explains that she sometimes hears her memoir read aloud in angry tone
–even though she wouldn’t read her own words in that way. And while her younger
brother, as an adult, demanded an apology from their mother, Wall’s decided not
to see herself as needing to “forgive” anyone –thereby framing herself as the
victim. The best example is probably found in the book’s title; Walls explained
that while mention of their father’s “glass castle” evokes feeling of
bitterness and disappointment in her siblings, she now sees it as the promise
that kept her going, a representation of her hope for a better future.

And a third theme that I want to just briefly touch on
is that while we may “get the life we want” (like Walls commented in one of her
college courses while thinking of her homeless parents), it is rarely that
simple. Walls (again in the interview) explained that as she grew to understand her
mother better, she realized that Rose Mary was lacking in some very basic skills
required to hold down a job. She came to the conclusion that her mother may
have been, like she explained to Wall’s younger brother when he demanded an
apology, doing the best that she could in a difficult situation. The
implications here about the judgments we may pass on others who live in
conditions of poverty seem pretty clear.

So I guess I’ve come up with a bunch of seemingly
contradictory ideas and conclusions. Weird how often that seems to happen to me.
I’m starting to think that maybe the whole truth of something is usually a
combination of its two, seemingly opposite halves. But since I’m pretty sure I’m
not quite up to that level philosophizing, we’ll call it a day.
Here is that link to the Jeannette Walls interview I kept referring to:
Jeannette Walls Interview

On Being a Young Woman and a Mormon. Thoughts inspired by "The Book of Mormon Girl: A Memoir of an American Faith" by Joanna Brooks

Before downloading said book to my kindle ipad app, I read a few reviews to get a better idea of what I would be in for. The conclusion seemed to be, that whatever criticism you may find of Brooks’ retelling, it succeeds at its main purpose: that of being good, honest memoir. I also found these quotes about memoirs while reading a review from “bhodges” from the website, By Common Consent:

You’re sure to hear a few such discordant notes as Brook’s fingers glide up and down the scale, but to focus on such slips overlooks the book’s overall melody... Memoirs aren’t intended to tell a disconnected story of one’s life, but to invite readers into an intensely subjective world... American publisher William Sloan says readers of such works are not so much saying to the author ‘Tell me about you,’ but rather ‘Tell me about me; as I use your book and life as a mirror.’”

And this was certainly the phenomenon that I experienced while reading the first few chapters, recalling the fierce and often tumultuous emotions of my middle school years like nothing I have ever read before. Of course it was also the first time I’d really read a first-hand account of what it was like to be a young and awkward girl growing up in the LDS faith. I think the beauty of good memoir is that it allows one to reflect and to experience without sitting in any sort of judgment seat –without wondering which influences were “good” or “bad,” or, worse in this instance, without trying to fit everything that stemmed from my being a Mormon and a young woman into a tidy, brown-paper package of “good.”

To quote the first paragraph if chapter 3, “The year we all turned twelve, the boys in my Sunday School class received the priesthood…That’s what Chuckie, Mike, and Brian got for their twelfth birthdays. I got Marie Osmond’s Guide to Beauty, Health and Style.” Following this statement, there is no overt discussion of gender roles in the church, of whether or not things are as they should be in LDS youth culture. There is instead a rather poetic and humorous description of the pin-sharp impressions that the pictures and quotes from Marie Osmond, the Mormon dream girl who was apparently achieving perfection here on earth, left on Brooks’ idealistic young-adult mind.  I loved that she could still picture the exact poses and quotes from various pages of the book. Because, while I’ve never actually seen a copy of Marie Osmond’s Guide to Beauty, Health and Style, I played out my own versions of this experience time and time again. For me, there was the Guide for the Winter Woman by a company called Chroma (I'd never actually been tested by a Chroma color analyst specialist, but my mom was certain that I was a “Winter”). How I poured over those black and white sketches of different Winter woman hair styles, and dreamed of the day when my own long, unruly, always-parted-down-the-middle, never-styled-or-touched-with-product locks would be transformed into a glorious, womanly hairdo! There was my subscription to the magazine Seventeen from which I eagerly read make-up tips. And how could I forget the day during my junior year of high school when I discovered The Fascinating Woman on our living room bookshelf and began studying it with something akin to religious zeal (if you've never heard of this book, please look it up).

That author explains a sort of kinship that she felt with Marie Osmond as a fellow Mormon girl. But more, you get a sense of how adhering to this guide filled a void of purpose in her life. She writes, “You and me, Marie, wrestling the dark energies of childhood depressions and nascent eating disorders…What to do with our bodies? If they were not instruments of priesthood power, and not yet instruments of eternal procreation, what was our purpose?” This next quote especially struck a chord with me: “Marie, your precisely numbered regimens gave me great comfort. Especially the idea that with a little practice I could change, I could convert those long columns of personal minuses into a perfect string of pluses.” This idea that I would overcome all -or at least most- of my flaws while in this earthly life -why oh why was this idea so strongly ingrained in my mind? What’s more, what was there to make me think that once I had reached a state of “Marie Osmond awesomeness” there was anything to guarantee that I would stay there? I wish someone could have disillusioned me of these ideas a lot sooner. I think I'd have been much happier for it.

I’m still not sure what all of this has to do with growing up as a young woman in the church. Maybe the author and I just both happened to be intense young women, demanding too much of ourselves at a very young age in our quest for finding meaning in life and eventual perfection. Whatever the case, growing up in the church added many subtle colors to my life, colors that have been integrated into the “whole” of me in some ways that I think I am only beginning to understand.

I certainly don’t mean for this to be a negative post. I think the overall impact of my experiences in the young womens’ program of the church were overwhelmingly positive (After all, it was at a young womens’ activity that I learned the side-part for my hair, the only “style” I  ever really adopted. Ouch. Sorry, I couldn’t resist that one). But in all seriousness, I had many wonderful experiences studying scriptures, serving in the church, and, most of all, feeling the very real and immediate love of my Heavenly Father –many of these experiences brought on as a direct result from my involvement in the church as a youth. And that is to say nothing of the sense of belonging and confidence that I so desperately needed and was able to find therein.

As you've probably guessed though, I’d like to open up a discussion about being a young woman in the church. What were your experiences? Was there too much emphasis on health and beauty? Did you place unrealistic demands on yourself in order to “prepare” to be a saintly wife and mother someday? Did you sense a vacancy of purpose during those years of waiting for the dreamed-of temple marriage to arrive? And, most importantly, what do you think could be done to improve the system –in the church and in the world at large? –How can we encourage young women to “dream big” without coming up with crazy expectations of personal perfection? How can we give motherhood the respect it deserves, without making it the “end all, be all” of mortal existence? After all, and now speaking from personal experience on this one, being a mother will not stop a woman from needing to be an individual -a person- too. And, as much as these words may be spoken during Young Women lessons, how can we get our young women to actually believe them?

How can we help our young women to love their bodies, to love their idiosyncrasies, and, yes, even to love their imperfections -or, at the very least to make peace with them? How can we better prepare them for the possibility of their R.M. in shining armor never making his long-awaited appearance? How can we better prepare them for a life that will almost always fall short of their visions of a celestial home here on earth? I think these are very big and very important questions (while also giving some insight into why I am completely terrified to raise a teenage daughter). I’d really like to hear your ideas on these issues. Please sound off below.