I've labeled this post as "media recommendations" but also as "other recommendations" because, beyond recommending this particular book, I am recommending getting educated about fertility awareness.
I hope this is not a taboo topic to post about on a blog. Because I think it is something that should be shared. (Thanks to my wonderful sister-in-law for sharing it with me and to whoever shared it with her before that.) I also think it is something that is not shared nearly often enough. In the "marriage intimacy preparation" course I took from BYU's Student Health Center, for example, the physician teaching the class barely mentioned this option while going over her "birth control" chart. On the other hand, probably a solid 30 minutes were spent talking about the pill. Now, granted, the newlywed years may not be the most ideal time for practicing FAM as a method of birth control, but I think this represents a common attitude among medical professionals. What is the message there? That this FAM is too complicated for the average patient to understand? Requires too much self-control? Does anyone else find that just a little bit insulting? But I digress.
FAM as Birth Conrol
Let's get this straight I am NOT recommending FAM as a method of birth control for everyone; obviously, it will not be a good fit for many people, and even those for whom it is will probably only practice it during certain times in their lives (for example, it may not be the best method for women who are partially-breast feeding). What I AM recommending is discovering what it actually is and then considering it as a birth control option -especially if you are sensitive to hormonal birth control methods like I am. (Even on the "mild symptom" Nuva Ring, I was starting to get used to near-constant hunger cravings and a daily bout with nausea in the late afternoons.)
Not to go into too much detail, but there is nothing mysterious, hoodo voodoo, or pseudoscience about fertility awareness. Actually, it is a perfectly logical idea: learn how to tell when you are fertile and then adjust your love life accordingly. Did you know that the woman is actually only fertile for a couple of days each cycle (her egg only stays alive for a day or so)? But taking the man's fertility into account (he is always fertile and his sperm can stay alive for about 5 days), that totals 1-2 weeks of combined fertility. Amazingly, our bodies will let us know when we are in that fertile zone. If we know what to look for.
The other thing I wanted to mention is that you can be as conservative as you want to be with this method. Follow the rules exactly, and you're covered. However, during months when your body isn't sending as clear of signals (anovulatory cycles, for instance) or anytime you don't feel 100% confident, take extra precautions. (During the first 5 days of my period is an example of a time when I feel 100% confident. Another time is a couple of days after I have charted a clear ovulatory temperature shift.)
And finally, I like that the man can be a more active participant in this method (Dave actually writes my temperatures down in my chart most mornings).
FAM to Conceive
When we were trying to get pregnant with Peter, I had a pretty strong inkling that we'd conceived long before I got the positive test result. That's because I was acutely aware of when I had ovulated. If we were struggling to get pregnant, or we just wanted to maximize our chances for a particular month, it would make perfect sense to start with fertility awareness.
FAM for General Body Awareness
I like trying to figure out what my body is doing. I like knowing where I am at -hormonal-ly- in my cycle. Am I more hungry, tired, or anxious at different points in my cycle? Am I ovulating normally? For example, there were a few months last winter when I was suffering with some insomnia/anxiety and my charting was all over the place (I think I had some anovulatory months). Anyway, it was another indication to me that something was "off" with my body. I think this book lists some other great benefits, but (confession) I never finished the last few chapters. Not because the book was intimidating though. Weschler makes it all very user-friendly and throws in plenty of humor for good measure.
I didn't give many details, but this blog post (random blog I ran across when searching for the picture) seemed to do a good job at dispelling several myths.
http://brightonwoman.blogspot.com/2009/03/fertility-awareness-method-fam.html
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